It's Simon Carryer dot com!


I do kind of a lot of stuff! I've tried to collect it all in one place, for easier bragging.


I've published a bunch of essays on Medium.

Damn Near Killed Him is about President James Garfield's pretty revolting death. Macho Anti-Patterns is about tech industry culture stuff.

A lot of my essays are about, like, data stuff, since that's what I do for work. I Spoiled Wordle... is about everyone's favourite word puzzle. Burger Wellington Data Analysis is about the analysis I do every year on Wellington's annual burger festival. A Stab in the Dark was the first essay I published, and it's about what a "stab" is. Oh! Bat Milk is about which animal's milk people would rather drink.

Finally, I wrote a really long series about various techniques in machine learning. I've been meaning to rehost that somewhere else since the articles are soft-paywalled, but for now they're still on Medium.


I wrote a tutorial about Pandas, a Python library for doing data stuff. I couldn't think of a good name for it so it's just called Pandas Tutorial. Archetypal Dog Names is kind of demonstrating a data analysis thing, but mostly it's an excuse for cute dog stuff. Mutant Flowers is a demonstration of using genetic programming on ASTs. It's as stupid as it sounds.



Maybe you'd like to get in touch about something? Email me at, or try @simoncarryer on Twitter if that's your thing.


I play a bit of banjo. I'm in a cool band called The Bidibids and we are all very good-looking and talented.

Before that I was in a cool band called Barry and the Crumpets and we made an album, A Good Keen Band.


Sometimes I do talks at conferences. Usually on, like, tech stuff. Data is a Soft Science is a talk I gave at "Yow! Data 2018" about data science and social anthropology. Doing Stupid Things With ASTs is a talk I gave at PyCon Australia in 2021, about ASTs and genetic programming.


I make a lot of stupid websites.

  • My Neighbour Toutouwai displays data gathered as part of a native bird monitoring project in the reserve by my house.
  • Movie Maths adds movies together.
  • Birdle is a daily quiz about New Zealand birds.
  • Bat Milk is a survey about what animals' milk people would rather drink.
  • One Million Dungeons generates random dungeons. for 5e Dungeons and Dragons.
  • Deep Dickinson uses deep learning to generate Emily Dickinson poems.

Fan Fiction

I've written some fan-fiction, mostly as a joke? I'm a little embarassed about putting it here because some of it is quite smutty. Anyway, here goes:

  • Family Secret is an extremely filthy Harry Potter story. I quite like this one.
  • I wrote A Winter for Wolves to annoy someone. It's horny Werewolf!Captain America fic. Don't read it.
  • Anne Under the Moon is Anne of Green Gables with werewolves. Not smutty.

Role Playing Games

I like Dungeons and Dragons a fairly normal amount. I made a separate page for that stuff.